About Death

My first encounter with death was 6 years ago.

One Saturday morning, our maid woke me up. She said something about my Lolo. I ran to his house and saw him being revived. Lola was in one corner, crying. Ninong Ading was telling her not to worry. But yes, how could she not worry?

Then there was that traumatic sound of ambulance siren. I vividly remember our neighbor’s maid looking over as my Lolo was being transferred to the ambulance.

An hour, two passed. Then there was that phone call at past ten am. Mommy said, “wala na lolo nyo.”

I went inside, told my sisters and I went directly to the bathroom. There I cried.

My Lolo was in many ways my father. In fact, I feel a void inside me knowing that he’s not here anymore to see me do the news. He was my inspiration since he loved to read newspapers—he loved to watch newscasts.

But that encounter of death was at the same time my first encounter of true love.

While we waited for Lolo’s remains and before we went to the church where he will be buried- I remember Lola saying, “wala na lolo nyo…”

I remember seeing her cry.

That was true love.

I asked myself- how can she now cope living alone? Suddenly after more than 50 years of being together—things just ended in one instant.

I though death was selfish. And it was rude.

Up to this day, I occasionally see Lola hide her tears. Whenever she starts reminiscing about the old days- when Lolo was still alive, I know she does so because she misses him dearly.

***
Last Monday, it was my turn to see another encounter with death.

Though not my own, I felt sad for Attorney Rene Saguisag having to lose Dulce, his wife in a tragic car accident.

And what’s more sad is that up to this day- he has no idea of what happened to his wife. He himself is recuperating from that accident. I can’t imagine the pain and what scene that would be—if and when he is told she is gone.

I wondered, what could they have been doing minutes before that dumptruck hit their van? Could they be fighting? Or were they talking about the dance they just had?

I believe the last minutes were happy moments.
For Dulce’s lips were painted with a smile.